Your Own Wellbeing

Caring For Your Own Wellbeing - if a close family member has a mental illness

 

To download as a PDF factsheet click here

 

 

Some coping tips

 

When faced with the challenges associated with caring for your relative or friend with a mental illness, it is important to also actively nurture your own physical and mental wellbeing.

 It will greatly add to your peace of mind if you equip yourself to handle the demands of caring as well as crisis situations by:

 

  • Becoming informed about every aspect of the illness. This will not only enable you to support your family member who is ill, but to also have realistic expectations.
  • Formulating plans of action before the crisis happens – wherever possible involve the person who has a mental health problem in this planning.
  • Being aware of emergency services offered by your local mental health team can prevent panic in an emergency. Ask for this information in case you might need it in the future.
  • Having necessary phone numbers and other information on hand so that you can feel confident, decisive, and secure in being prepared.
  • Making sure that your own physical, social and emotional needs are met so that you can cope with the stresses that carers can experience over long periods of time.

 

Caring for your wellbeing

 

 As a carer you do not have to cope alone. Be aware that it is not unusual to feel upset or overwhelmed, and that feelings of depression are common.Understand that your feelings are normal reactions to stressful situations. You may like to consider the following suggestions, and try to select the ones you could most easily do.Begin with those, and introduce some others step by step. 
  • Maintain a social life outside the home, however limited it may be. Above all don’t make yourself a slave to your family member’s illness. You have a right to a life of your own.
  • Don’t isolate yourself from others, especially don’t create a barrier as a ‘defense mechanism’ against being hurt if someone you have told about the illness has not shown understanding.
  • Remember self-care – try to eat well and get regular sleep and exercise. Use relaxation techniques in stressful times.
  • Participate in interests that you find satisfying and rewarding. Your hobbies or job, fun activities or study, a community commitment. All of these help prevent the illness taking over your life.
  • Accept support and seek help when you need it. Learn what strategies suit you best.
  • Individual support and counselling are available to carers. Contact the ARAFMI Information & Support Line to find out more.

 

Your physical health

 

 It is important to recognise that everyone experiences stress throughout their life. Stress occurs when there are complex demands made on us.
  • Stress associated with caring for a person who is experiencing mental health problems is recognised as damaging to a carer’s physical and emotional well-being. Examples of physical symptoms of stress are headaches, stomach upsets, sleep disturbance, agitation, changes in appetite, and difficulty concentrating.
  • When the human body is placed under physical and psychological stress it can cause increases in the production of certain hormones such as adrenalin and cortisol. These hormones produce marked changes in heart rate, blood pressure levels, metabolism and physical activity.

 

Recovery and you

 

There may well be a need to be constantly ‘on duty’ in times of crisis. However, when the crisis is over be careful not to remain on 24-hour alert. To do so cuts down on your ability to think clearly, drains your energy, limits your effectiveness, and puts you at risk of burn out.

 

A mental illness does not interfere with a person’s intelligence. It is possible that your ill relative could be feeling guilty for causing you stress. You need not add to that guilt by continuing to give your ‘all’.

 

As your family member moves along their path of recovery, it will help you and them immensely if they can learn to become as self-sufficient as possible.

 

Allow them to stumble through their own mistakes and learn their own coping strategies.

 

This will enable them to slowly regain their independence, even if the road is painful and expensive for both of you.

  

Things to keep in mind

 
  • If you feel the stress in your life is becoming overwhelming it may be helpful to deal with the different stresses one at a time.
  • Individual support and counselling options are available to mental health carers.
  • There are mental health courses available to assist you in your caring role, and to provide you with skills to support yourself and your family.
  • Support groups give you an opportunity to share your experiences and learn from others who are in a similar situation.
  • Respite services may be available to offer a break.

 

Commonwealth Carer Respite Centre

(1800 059 059) can provide short-term and emergency respite

 

 Information about other services that support carers can be obtained from

Commonwealth Carelink (1800 052 222)

 

  Looking after yourself

 

  1. Maintain hope. Remember you are not alone
  2. Focus on the positives, however small or few
  3. Become better informed about the illness as soon as possible
  4. Let go of guilt. It is nobody’s fault
  5. Enjoy the good days
  6. Keep your sense of humour
  7. Keep up your friendships, normal activities, and interests as much as possible
  8. Remain in control of your own life and home
  9. Remember your own needs and those of other family members
  10. ‘Letting go’ does not mean abandonment

 

FOR MORE INFORMATION CALL:

ARAFMI Information & Support Line

9332 0700 – SYDNEY callers

1800 655 198 – REGIONAL callers