Hi, I'm new here.
Writing because my beautiful boyfriend of 2 years has been showing all the signs of depression, and I missed them. He broke up with me 2 weeks ago and that was what made me open my eyes: avoidance, low libido, irrationality, irritability...and no, there was definitely no one else. I've known he suffers from depression, but I hadn't noticed he'd stopped his medication until it was too late. He has a history of doing this, I only just discovered it. Of course I tried to talk with him about it, but I got hte classic "I'm not depressed" response.
I'm living with a friend nearby, missing him terribly, and wishing I'd seen the signs earlier or responded differently. Any ideas? I tried to contact his psych, but of course, she won't speak with me because of patient confidentiality. I just want us to be together, it sounds so cliched, but he's such a beautiful soul, I hate to see him sabotage such a wonderful relationship.
I must admit that I have sabotaged relationships in the past due to anxiety/depression. I can't speak for your boyfriend, but I found that distancing myself from the relationship appeared to me to be the most certain action as opposed to the very uncertain move of working on the relationship. The latter was such an unfamiliar process, and I felt shamed. Instead, I would stop engaging and deny that anything was wrong.